Good Evening

This is John Hodgman writing the 15th of 20th total electronic mailings regarding…

THE AREAS OF MY EXPERTISE

An actual book of fake knowledge available wherever actual books are sold.

SEE HERE

THIS MAILING SHALL CONTAIN INFORMATION ON 8 TOTAL ITEMS, NUMBERED SEQUENTIALLY

1. YESTERDAY EVENING, I was a guest of THE MAJORITY REPORT on AIR AMERICA. Evidence of this may be found here; SEE HERE . Sam Seder is a man who knows his submarine slang.

2. MEANWHILE, thanks also to the famous radio program THE DAILY SHOW WITH JON STEWART for having me as its guest last Wednesday. They were very gracious hosts, supplying me with CREAM SODA and ALTOIDS for the rest of the year. And for a radio program, they really do have A BEAUTIFUL SET. A clip is available here: SEE HERE

3. Those who require FURTHER EXCITING COMPUTER DOWNLOADS may see me wearing a tie HERE , where I appear as A DERANGED MILLIONAIRE courtesy of the everlasting, always-blasting THEY MIGHT BE GIANTS.

4. ELSEWHERE ON THE INTERNET, BOING BOING, a directory increasingly devoted to hobo illustration, amazingly points out that there are a number of ILLUSTRATED HOBO NAMES now available on the web, and that number is: 100 OR MORE—including many by apelad. SEE HERE

5. ALMOST PENULTIMATELY, may I say thank you to the city of Seattle for all your hospitality the USE OF YOUR PUBLIC AIRWAVES ( KUOW ). A full report on my visit to AMERICA’S SPACE-NEEDLE-TOWN will be posted in the pages of the Stranger—IN THE FUTURE!

6. MYSTERY PERFORMANCES. For many weeks, I have been unable to tell you the start time of certain upcoming performances. NOW THEY CAN BE REVEALED.

**MONDAY, Nov 28’s performance at MO PITKIN’S in NYC (34 Avenue A) SHALL BEGIN AT 7PM (Jonathan COULTON shall play songs of his own making after the reading).

**WEDNESDAY, Nov 30’s performance at HOW TO KICK PEOPLE (D Lounge, 101 East 15th Street) SHALL BEGIN AT 7:30PM and shall welcome ILLUSTRATIONS BY EMILY FLAKE ( SEE HERE )

**THURSDAY, Dec 1’s performance at the UNIVERSITY OF BALTIMORE with David Rees, Lizzie Skurnick, and COULTON SHALL BEGIN AT 7PM.

7. BALTIMORE begins a series of MID ATLANTIC appearances by COULTON and ME in the company of DAVID REES. We will be traveling BY CAR—I hope, by STATION WAGON, and we will see you ON THE ROAD. I hope. More news to follow.

8. UNTIL THEN, I wish you HAPPY THANKSGIVING. Turkey is a proven soporific, but luckily MOST MASHED POTATOES IN AMERICA CONTAIN TRACES OF CRYSTAL METH.

9. THAT IS ALL.

Good Evening

This is John Hodgman writing the 15th of 20th total electronic mailings regarding…

THE AREAS OF MY EXPERTISE

An actual book of fake knowledge available wherever actual books are sold.

SEE HERE

THIS MAILING SHALL CONTAIN INFORMATION ON 8 TOTAL ITEMS, NUMBERED SEQUENTIALLY

1. YESTERDAY EVENING, I was a guest of THE MAJORITY REPORT on AIR AMERICA. Evidence of this may be found here; SEE HERE . Sam Seder is a man who knows his submarine slang.

2. MEANWHILE, thanks also to the famous radio program THE DAILY SHOW WITH JON STEWART for having me as its guest last Wednesday. They were very gracious hosts, supplying me with CREAM SODA and ALTOIDS for the rest of the year. And for a radio program, they really do have A BEAUTIFUL SET. A clip is available here: SEE HERE

3. Those who require FURTHER EXCITING COMPUTER DOWNLOADS may see me wearing a tie HERE , where I appear as A DERANGED MILLIONAIRE courtesy of the everlasting, always-blasting THEY MIGHT BE GIANTS.

4. ELSEWHERE ON THE INTERNET, BOING BOING, a directory increasingly devoted to hobo illustration, amazingly points out that there are a number of ILLUSTRATED HOBO NAMES now available on the web, and that number is: 100 OR MORE—including many by apelad. SEE HERE

5. ALMOST PENULTIMATELY, may I say thank you to the city of Seattle for all your hospitality the USE OF YOUR PUBLIC AIRWAVES ( KUOW ). A full report on my visit to AMERICA’S SPACE-NEEDLE-TOWN will be posted in the pages of the Stranger—IN THE FUTURE!

6. MYSTERY PERFORMANCES. For many weeks, I have been unable to tell you the start time of certain upcoming performances. NOW THEY CAN BE REVEALED.

**MONDAY, Nov 28’s performance at MO PITKIN’S in NYC (34 Avenue A) SHALL BEGIN AT 7PM (Jonathan COULTON shall play songs of his own making after the reading).

**WEDNESDAY, Nov 30’s performance at HOW TO KICK PEOPLE (D Lounge, 101 East 15th Street) SHALL BEGIN AT 7:30PM and shall welcome ILLUSTRATIONS BY EMILY FLAKE ( SEE HERE )

**THURSDAY, Dec 1’s performance at the UNIVERSITY OF BALTIMORE with David Rees, Lizzie Skurnick, and COULTON SHALL BEGIN AT 7PM.

7. BALTIMORE begins a series of MID ATLANTIC appearances by COULTON and ME in the company of DAVID REES. We will be traveling BY CAR—I hope, by STATION WAGON, and we will see you ON THE ROAD. I hope. More news to follow.

8. UNTIL THEN, I wish you HAPPY THANKSGIVING. Turkey is a proven soporific, but luckily MOST MASHED POTATOES IN AMERICA CONTAIN TRACES OF CRYSTAL METH.

9. THAT IS ALL.

Number 54 Gila Monster Junior
Originally uploaded by Ape Lad.

Here is apelad. Say hello to him and all the folks at flickr.

Number 54 Gila Monster Junior
Originally uploaded by Ape Lad.

Here is apelad. Say hello to him and all the folks at flickr.

GOOD EVENING

This is John Hodgman writing the 13th of only 20 such electronic messages I intend to send regarding…

THE AREAS OF MY EXPERTISE

(A book of words and fake facts available now at THE LADY KILLIGREW CAFÉ in Montague, Massachusetts, and also in OTHER FINE BOOKSTORES THAT ARE MUCH EASIER TO FIND, BUT NOT SO NEAR TO WATERFALLS… http://www.theladykilligrew.com/)

Tonight (11/9/05, a Tuesday) I contact you regarding 10 items.

1. Our many thanks… to the kind people of Illinois and Massachusetts who came to visit with me, Coulton, and the entire town of Brookline, Massachusetts.

2. A special acknowledgment… goes to the many high school classmates who surprised, unnerved, and delighted me with their presence in those lands: Lorchie, Dmitry, D-Kidd, Danzy, Maz, Beth C, Amy C, Deaderick and Layman, Mike ‘n’ Damon G, X-Tine, Liz, “J” and all the rest: I will always remember the good times we had at BHS. WE ROLLED A JEEP. Brookline 4-eva.

3. Additional thanks… to Mr. Patrick Borelli, who traveled at the very last minute at the Lady Killigrew and, as I did, left a small part of himself there above the waterfall forever (in his case: an ear). In his tribute, I offer: this website: www.patrickborelli.com

4. Our thanks in advance… to any who wish to join us in PARK SLOPE tomorrow evening, Thursday, Nov 10, at 7:30PM. There, at THE BARNES AND NOBLE, Coulton and I will present material from THE ABOVE-MENTIONED and will also appraise the current market value of your strollers.

5. Thereafter… CALIFORNIA (northern portion), where we shall be appearing at Diesel Books in Oakland on Sunday (Nov 13) at 3PM and the Booksmith in SF on Monday (Nov 14) at 7PM. As always, all details may be found by going to www.areasofmyexpertise.com and clicking on the words “good evening.” Sorry: No strollers will be appraised.

6. Burying the lead… I am told I will appear on “The Daily Show” on Wednesday, Nov 16, at the standard time of 11PM EST. No electronic message can contain my feelings about this (without killing you with electricity). So I will cease on this subject.

7. Meanwhile… there are now 69 Hoboes that have been drawn by uncompensated strangers whom I both adore and fear. Won’t you please micro-pay them with at least a kind comment? They are great. http://www.flickr.com/photos/tags/700hoboes/

8. Next week… information on John Hodgman, a deranged millionaire, if only in “the moving pictures.”

9. Otherwise… THAT IS ALL

THIS CONCLUDES #13 of 20 regarding THE AREAS OF MY EXPERTISE.

As always, REQUESTS to join this mailing list, AND QUESTIONS on this or any subject may be posed to Hodgman@littlegraybooks.com.

If you wish to be removed from this mailing list, simply respond to this address and include the word “I HAVE HEARD ENOUGH” in your reply.

The final mailing on this subject will be made January 2, 2006.