I AM ALSO PLEASED TO DENY THE FACEBOOK RUMOR that Roderick, Rees, and I are all the same person. WE ARE AT LEAST TWO PEOPLE

THANK YOU.

That is all.

I AM STEALING A THIN STREAM OF INTERNET FROM THE AIR to tell you:

TICKETS for Friday’s John Roderick and David Rees REESDERICK-SPLOSION go on sale this Wednesday.

TO BUY ONE OR TWO, simply call The Montague Bookmill (413-367-9206) on Wednesday starting around 10 AM.

I MAY EVEN ANSWER THE PHONE. If I do, you may go ahead and be a jerk to me.

BUT IF YOU GET A BOOKMILL EMPLOYEE, please be kind. For these are not “TICKET MASTERS” but simply people who work in a used bookstore by a little river.

I THINK THEIR CREDIT CARD MACHINE may actually be powered by a pellet stove.

SO HAVE PATIENCE, and call on wednesday, for it will be a lovely show, and it will happen this Friday at the Montague Bookmill, and it will happen at EIGHT PM.

That is all

I AM AWARE THAT TIME IS PASSING, and merely a week remains before the JOHN RODERICK SINGING AND TALKING CONCERT at the Montague Bookmill.

I HAVE MEANWHILE LEARNED the happy news that prior to Roderick, David Rees, the famous cartoonist and craftsman, will be giving a rare, live ARTISANAL PENCIL SHARPENING DEMONSTRATION.

LET ME TELL YOU, you do not want to miss this demonstration of this TIMELESS AMERICAN HANDI-ART, especially when it is given in a beautiful old gristmill by a little river.

I HAVE ALSO BEEN REMINDED that 8/20 is also the MONTAGUE OLD HOME DAYS, where the people of Montague gather on the Town Green, steps from the Bookmill, and eat hot dogs and play games. So come up and make a day of it. JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT FROM MONTAGUE DOES NOT MEAN YOU CANNOT ATTEND, as all stoning of outsiders has been suspended.

THE WHOLE DAY WILL BE A POSTCARD that you send to yourself. And when it arrives, inevitably, in 17 months, you will be glad you attended. Don’t write in the space for the stamp!

BUT: don’t ask me what time the concert starts. I’m not sure. I guess around 8PM. I WILL LET YOU KNOW.

BUT ALL OF THESE DETAILS REMAIN IN PLACE

FRIDAY, 8/20, in the evening, following Montague Old Home Days,

JOHN RODERICK will sing and talk and play guitar

PRECEDED by an Artisanal Pencil Sharpening demonstration by DAVID REES

AND INTRODUCED BY ME, John Hodgman

AT THE MONTAGUE BOOKMILL, which is found at 440 Greenfield Road, in Montague Center, Massachusetts.

AT THE NECESSARY PRICE OF 10 dollars.

FOOD AND DRINK AVAILABLE ON SITE.

That is all.

AS PREVIOUSLY NOTED ON TWITTER, whichever one of you internet users clued George RR Martin to the fact that I am/was reading GAME OF THRONES… THANKS.*

NOW I FEEL like I have George RR Martin staring at me as I read. (An illusion: it’s actually just some guy here in the internet cafe wearing a big fake Santa beard).

BUT THESE ARE BRILLIANTLY ADDICTIVE BOOKS, and I owe it all to the twitter recommendation of Mr. Matt Robinson.

WHICH IS WHY I HAVE NOT READ MR MATT ROBINSON’S NEW SCREENPLAY YET. I’m sorry, Matt, but you have only yourself to blame. And Peter Dinklage, of course. ALWAYS PETER DINKLAGE.

That is all.

*BE WARNED BEFORE YOU FOLLOW THAT LINK. George RR Martin uses livejournal, apparently because he is blogging from MEDIEVAL TIMES.

I REGRET MY INTERNET SILENCE. As you know, I am passing these humid months in the small Massachusetts town known as INTERNETLESS HILLS, only occasionally descending down from the mountains to buy coffee and steal broadband and news of the world.

ONE EXAMPLE OF SUCH NEWS: while listening to the local radio station, I heard a woman describe a forthcoming local stage show thusly: “It is an exploration of the cultural extinction of New Orleans, as told by a person who is half man, half wolf.”

(!!!!!)

I ONLY WISH I could offer you such a show.

AS IT HAPPENS, I CAN OFFER only this:

JOHN RODERICK, of Seattle’s own “The Long Winters“, who is NOT half wolf, but merely Alaskan, which is to say : ONE QUARTER CAVE TROLL…

SINGING GOOD SONGS written by his own hands…

ON FRIDAY, AUGUST 20th, sometime in the evening…

AT THE MONTAGUE BOOKMILL, a creaky former gristmill that has been transformed into a creaky used bookstore/cafe/comfy-armchair-storage-facility, and a very fine place to write books of fake trivia.

PLUS THERE WILL BE OTHER SURPRISES THAT I WILL REVEAL LATER.

AND THERE WILL BE A SMALL CHARGE of 10 dollars, in order to cover the cost of transporting a quasi-cave troll from Seattle.

I HOPE YOU UNDERSTAND THIS NECESSITY, and are not dissuaded.

FOR WHILE THE FAMOUS MOTTO OF THIS BOOKMILL is “Books You Don’t Need in a Place You Can’t Find,” it is in fact EASY TO FIND if you live in New England and have the Internet.

AND I PLEASE ENCOURAGE YOU TO FIND IT, for this will be a very enjoyable evening, much like the hot time we all spent together with Jonathan Coulton some years ago, when it was so humid and awesome that apparently cameras could not even focus properly.

DID YOU FORGET WHAT I WAS JUST TALKING ABOUT? If so, here is John Roderick again. I hope I will see you there…

THAT IS ALL.