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When you’re in a long-term relationship, it’s only natural to fall into a sexual rut. You get used to the same positions, and before long, it begins to feel routine.
Especially if you’ve got kids and have limited time for hanky panky, it’s easy for things to start feeling rote.
But if you let the apathy continue, it can lead to more serious relationship problems. Over time, you may stop having sex so often, which can strain your intimacy and closeness as a couple.
So in this post, we’re going to cover a few ways to avoid staying in the same sex routine every night because your relationship is worth it.
Think about your desires
Often, the first thing people do when they want to spice up their sex life is to ask about what the other person wants. And while this is a great idea, it’s not always going to be the source of inspiration you’re after.
There’s a chance you may even make the other person feel inadequate, depending on how you approach this subject. So if you start with something fun you’d like to do in the bedroom, it offers a relatively innocent way for you to introduce something fresh and new without ringing any alarm bells. This isn’t about pointing out problems. In fact, it’s not about problems at all. It’s just about getting a little more creative and having fun.
Focus on what’s going well
When it’s time to talk to your partner about spicing things up in the bedroom, talk about the things you love first. The last thing you want is for this to sound like any sort of complaint.
Even if there are things you’d rather leave in the rearview mirror, don’t lead with that. You want to instill confidence in your partner, so they feel comfortable taking things to another level.
Both of you need to be honest about what’s working and what’s not, but this discussion should feel like a collaboration instead of an argument. Together, you can build the sex life of both of your dreams.
Believe it or not, some couples still do schedule sex. And when you have conflicting schedules, this can be a gamechanger. But if you’re used to having sex at the same time in the same place, it’s inevitably going to get boring.
If you can add some variety to the timing, do so. If you’re used to having sex in the morning, switch it to midday. You could even create a secret rendezvous to make it feel even more exciting.
You can also get creative with the places you have sex. And this can get as risque as you want, from public restrooms to the back seat of your family minivan.
Try to think back to how exciting things were when you first started dating and recreate moments like that in whatever way possible.
Play with positioning
If you do nothing else to switch up your sex life, try adding different sex positions. It should be something that you’re both comfortable with and excited to try. If you haven’t been very daring in the past, keep it simple to start. New positions can create different sensations that will make your sex life more interesting. And this is something you can experiment in your bedroom after the kids go to sleep or between shifts. Just be sure not to put any pressure on yourself or your partner. This is all about having fun together.
With a few small changes, you and your partner could be having a lot more fun in the bedroom (or anywhere you want!).