Does your sex life range from meh to bleh? You’re not alone. Couples who have been together for a while may struggle to have and enjoy sex together.
While it isn’t everything, good sex is essential for a healthy connection to your partner. And sex isn’t just good for your relationship; it can also help keep you healthy.
As important as sex is to a relationship and good health, it can be hard to keep things fresh. Trying something new and unknown can put some excitement back into your sex life!
If you’re wondering how to spice up your sex life, you’ve come to the right place. We’ve got the tips and tricks you need to get back on that horse and ride!
Table of Contents
1. Use a Toy
Sex toys! Often the first approach to spicing up a couple’s sex life.
There are many options available, so buckle in.
A couple’s vibrator is a great way to add a little play in the bedroom. You’ll feel sensations you’ve never felt before, and trying something new alongside your honey will be thrilling.
Want to do something a bit more interactive? Bondage can be sexy and stimulating.
Tie your partner’s hands up above their head or to the headboard. Cover their eyes with a scarf and work your magic. Start teasing and pleasuring your partner, and watch them squirm with delight!
2. Be Direct
There are three rules when it comes to sex: have consent, use communication, and don’t fake an orgasm!
Consent is essential. It doesn’t matter if you’ve been married for 20 years, you need consent to do anything to your partner.
Not only is consent necessary, but it’s sexy! Asking your partner, “can I go down on you” can turn you on in ways you haven’t felt in years!
Communication is of utmost importance in the bedroom. Tell your partner what feels good, what you don’t like, and what you want them to do next.
When you fake an orgasm, or even fake a moan, what you’re doing is communicating to your partner that what they’re doing is working. If it really isn’t, you’re doing both of you a disservice.
Sometimes boredom in the bedroom comes from monotony. When we are intimate with one person for a long time, it can be hard to get as excited about sex. It’s normal, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t fixable.
Roleplay allows you to be and feel like someone else while still getting down with your one and only. Talk about how you want it to happen, and anything that may be off-limits. For example, the ever-popular student/teacher fantasy may be uncomfortable for some.
Choose some different scenarios that you’re both comfortable with and play away!
4. Change of Location
One of the easiest ways to spice up your sex life is to change the scenery.
Find a secluded outdoor spot, go on a trip, or simply have sex in a different part of the house. Getting “away” from the same location can stimulate your mind so that you can get stimulated in other ways!
Another simple way to resurrect your sex life is by sending a provocative text.
While you or your partner are at work, send a sexy little text to remind them you’re thinking of them. Tell them what you want to do to them, and what you want them to do to you. Use that direct communication we learned about earlier in this article.
As long as you’re not going to get caught or in trouble, go ahead and send a risque picture. Just a shot down the cleavage or a picture of a penis bulge in the pants. Something that will show your significant other that you can’t wait to get your hands on them later.
This build-up will make you feel like a teen again! By the time you’re both home, you’ll be all revved up and ready for action.
6. Add a Partner
This tip isn’t made for all couples. When you’re in a committed relationship, it can be hard to come to terms with the fact that you may never be sexual with someone else again. Though completely normal, this train of thought can actually cause issues in your sex life and leave you feeling bored and unfulfilled.
For some couples, adding a third person in the bedroom can be just what they need to keep the relationship feeling fresh. If you’re not sure where to find a third person to join the fun, remember that you can take date night to a brothel.
For others, adding a third can really complicate the relationship. Tread carefully with this one, my friends! Make sure everyone is completely on board, and there are rules in place.
7. Get a Night Away
We mentioned a change in scenery earlier, and that is so important.
If you’re able to get away, do it! Especially if you live together or have children. A night away is necessary to revive your sexual desire for each other.
When you’re out of the house, it’s easier to not think about the floors that need vacuuming or the dishes that need washing. Seclude yourself in a rustic cabin, rent out a fancy hotel room, or take a trip to the beach. You’ll find that the break in your routine is good for your sex life.
8. Watch Porn Together
We all watch porn, right? Why not do it together? Watching another person or couple get turned on can make sex feel just a bit different.
We’ve got a couple of tips for you to make the porn-watching go smoothly.
Make sure you find and agree on a video ahead of time. Getting down to business just to find that you’re scrolling through pornos you have no interest in can ruin the mood.
If you can, play porn on a television or computer monitor. If you’re looking at your phone while trying to do the deed, it may get in the way.
9. Explore Yourself
In order to tell your partner what you like, you’ve got to know what gets you going. Take some time to pleasure and explore yourself.
Set the mood for yourself and really explore your body. Touch all over and learn what feels good. Also, let yourself express your pleasure; don’t be afraid to moan with delight.
Maybe your significant other will walk in and need to join!
Figure Out How to Spice up Your Sex Life
Did this list spark a few ideas? Take these tips home to your partner and talk about what works best for both of you. You’ll figure out how to spice up your sex life together.
Not being interested in sex can be attributed to many things. It could be just as simple as a boring sex life, but there could be more underneath the surface. While it may help to tackle new and exciting sexual adventures, make sure you address any underlying issues as well.
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