Is there a girl in your life that you would love to spend some time with but she doesn’t know that you exist? If so then you are certainly not alone and this can be a very frustrating time for you. Most people in this situation end up forgetting about it entirely or making a fool of themselves, but there is a better way. My Buddy Eric Wetlaufer is the best that I know when it comes to asking women out, so when we were talking on email last week ( he no longer lives here in Wesson,) I asked him what the secret was, and here was his reply.

Open and Honest

Eric says that the first step is to just be open and honest with the girl that you like, and be frank when you speak to her. Many guys will try and think of some smart line or funny joke which they can use as an ‘in’ but Eric says the best way to do it is just to walk up and speak.

Don’t Fear Rejection

The reason why most guys go up to girls with silly jokes and one liners is because they are scared of rejection, or more specifically they are scared that if they are themselves, that they will be declined. Eric tells me that he always had the attitude that not everyone likes everyone, that would be a strange world, so some will say yes, others will say no, it is just the way of the world. In most cases if you approach a woman with integrity and honesty, you are far more likely to have a chance than if you try to play Jack the Lad.

No Playing

Having a reparation as a player may be something that you mates enjoy but for a girl, fidelity is something which most hold dear, so put aside the player for the time being. If you live in a small neighborhood for example, everyone will know about your reputation, something which you’ll have to avoid when speaking with the girl.

Pay Attention

Dating is a game but not one that needs real guile and skill to play, something which Eric thinks that too many people put focus on. This is why very few men actually pay attention to women, as they think that there is some kind of game taking place that they need to be ready for. Unfortunately however whilst these guys are scheming on winning the game, they are not paying attention to anything that the girl is saying about herself, her likes and dislikes and ultimately her personality. Eric stresses that the one thing which girls will always say to him is how great he is at listening, and this is how he never has an issue going up to get the girl that he wants.

Be smart, remember that the girl is also a human, and go and have a conversation with her.